the · dust · blows · forwards


and the dust blows back

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I still feel elated from this morning's service. Receiving a blessing from the newly-consecrated bishop felt amazing--probably the most intense spiritual experience I've had since attending an amazing Gnostic Mass when I was still living in Connecticut. Wonderful! Counselor! 
Tags:
Current Mood:
wizardy
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Alice Liddell as St. Agnes by Julia Margaret Cameron
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I have to feel sure of being desired, not just tolerated.
Francesca Woodman
Current Mood:
artcrime
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2013 flowed on organically from 2012: still working, making money, living in NYC... Death was very much a presence in both years as well, with abject losses to my fam the previous year, and my father's passing in October of 2013. I'm still not quite prepared for ritual or talk surrounding that event.

I want to be more conscious this year, and preserve space for ritual and physical (including sexual) activity. I did some writing in 2012 which, looking back, wasn't terrible; this year I want to write more and read more, and find out more about readings and writings locally...


  • Swim more regularly

  • Have better, safer sex

  • Read more, write more

  • Experiment with make-up more often

  • Spend less money on the ganj

  • Smile less, talk more

Current Mood:
black-dove
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"Have you ever seen someone in an epileptic seizure?
I carried a woman bodily through a crowded auditorium this evening--I say it not for praise but out of sheer amazement at myself. We got her onto an elevator--I had to clasp her around the ribcage--and when she slumped to the floor I had the ridiculous thought that we should find a wooded spoon for her to bite onto. I think that's the only thing I ever knew about what to do in case of seizure. It seems dubious advice.

Otherwise it was so self-contained, almost tidy. She obviously had practice (maybe that's an unkind thing to say, but I don't mean it so). I mean it wasn't a scene at all, and when it was over she pulled herself together immediately. I think she said something like, "When it's over, it's gone." Whereas I think every time I've had a fit (not the epileptic kind) it's been a horrible conniption and I felt miserable long after. But I don't want to dwell on that in this letter. But I do think of the faults in my organism--faultlines maybe, because it's a kind of plate tectonics, things shift and then I must be careful not to fall into a sudden chasm."
Current Mood:
notepaper
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Current Mood:
marian
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Cuckoo, cuckoo
Wild bird are you;
Be never still, cuckoo!
Current Mood:
icumen in
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An 18th century miniature of Our Lady of Mariazell, Austria. Small colourful images like this were sold at the shrine for pilgrims to take home.
From the lovely All About Mary
Current Mood:
little hours
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Rosa Hersee as Alice and Arthur Elliot as the Hatter at the Opera Comique Theatre in London, 1898.

Current Mood:
much madness
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In Heaven I want to be a statue

an extended finger poised and ready

a perch for the Holy Ghost (little brown job)

any tiny bolt of joy

any little bird that needs

a shelter or a place to sing

A hidden song

Who in Heaven needs a way to hide?

Shouldn’t there be a light that touches all

Relieving fear in the dart of a divine Eye

Or will there be the early morning chill

Garden rooted in black soil, a me, a you

The life of an unseen bird spilled out in sweet shrill cries

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Current Mood:
aves
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